Sunday, October 6, 2013

Trying to be Strong

I woke up at 4:00am this morning with my tongue so swollen that I couldn't close my jaw. My tongue feeling like a baseball with swelling in the back of the throat that feelt like a ping-pong ball, each swallow tears at the stitches holding the old and new tongues together... I'm in so much pain while trying to trust and not fear that my tongue will reject itself.

My nurse, Cindy is good at what she does... talking me down off of the mental ledge while I try and unsuccessfully hold in my tears back so I won't show on the outside what my heart fears on the inside. After 45 minutes of her telling me stories about herself, her experiences, her 11-year marriage with her husband and her love of her two children, my mind switches to encouraging her on what I wish I had done differently in my marriage to my girl's mother so it would have survived. My breathing slows, smiles begin to replace my heaving shoulders.

It's going to be a long day. Thank you, Cindy, for getting me off on the right foot.



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4 comments:

  1. Its nice that someone is there to lift you up. Blessings ~

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  2. Hey Bob!
    I have very good memories from you during the time I was an exchange student in Olympia and had dinner at your house.
    It is great to see that you are holding up so well and still are the cheerful guy I saw every Friday morning at the Rotary meetings. I admire your strength and enthusiasm during these tough times and the fact that you share your story is very motivating. I wish you the best during recovery, just keep that courage and patience high.
    With luck next time I will be the one inviting you to dinner. Take care :)

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  3. Thank you so much for sharing your story. God has got your back all the way through! Please know you are a light to others and your journey and words of faith are helpful to others. My stepdad is about to undergo the same surgery in two days here in Houston - your hope and faith are inspiring and you are blessing others through this time. God will surely bless you! May your body heal and your hope love and faith persist through it all! God bless you and give you peace and strength to endure!! You are a son of the King!

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  4. I echo the thoughts previously said. Its okay to cry. Remember to let people help you. I know and feel part if your pain. I had tongue cancer 5 yrs ago. 1/4 of my tongue is missing. Not talking was hard. Not being able to eat was worse and I Ididn't think the radiation would ever end. But it did. You will get through this. Believe in yourself, smile, because you are an amazing man! Sending hugs your way. God bless you.

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